With a new year comes new resolutions, or, as is often the case, old resolutions that have been “repurposed” for a new year.
The proprietor of this blog, in a ham-fisted attempt to comport with societal norms, will endeavor to improve himself and, more importantly, the lives of those around him by attempting to adhere to several resolutions in 2013.
Some are more serious, others less so; it is up to the reader to determine which is which.
- Reduce the number of times I refer to idjits and amadáns as “idjits” and “amadáns,” especially if my girls are within earshot.
- Reduce blood pressure by reducing shopping at Wal-Mart. It has become apparent that saving 5 cents a box on Kraft macaroni and cheese isn’t worth having to put up with idjits and amadáns who shop there. I refer to a) the woman walking down the aisles singing at the top of her lungs; b) the woman carrying on a lengthy dialogue, in 80-decibel tones, with her 2-year-old on why said 2-year-old will not obey her; the man who parks his car directly in front of the store entrance and waits 15 minutes with the motor running and exhaust spewing while his spouse shops; the innumerable parents who yammer on cell phones while their children run screaming through the aisles like Sioux warriors chasing down Custer’s bedraggled 7th Cavalry; etc., ad nauseam. Continue reading